Here is one i heard........... Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most > embarrassing > first date that a woman ever had. > > The winner described her worst first date > experience. There was > absolutely no question as to why her tale took the > prize! She said it > was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and the > guy had taken her > skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , > Utah . > > It was a day trip (no overnight). They were > strangers, after > all, and truly had never met before. > > The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until > they were > headed home late that afternoon. > > They were driving back down the mountain, when she > gradually > began to realize that she should not have had that > extra latte. > > They were about an hour away from anywhere with a > rest room and > in the middle of nowhere! > > Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which > she did for a > while. > > Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow > going, there > came a point where she told him that he had better > stop and let her go > beside the road, or it would be the front seat of > his car. They stopped > and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked > her pants down and > started. > > In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so > she let her > butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. > > > Her companion stood on the side of the car watching > for traffic > and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from > peeking. All she > could think about was the relief she felt despite > the rather > embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing > however, she soon > became aware of another sensation. > > As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady > discovered her > buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. > > > Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came > to mind as > she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy > metal. It was quickly > apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the > extreme cold. > > Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor > of the moment , she > answered her date's concerns about "what is taking > so long" > with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt > off and in need of > some assistance!" > > He came around the car as she tried to cover herself > with her > sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his > eyes, he burst out > laughing. > > She too, got the giggles and when they finally > managed to > compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. > > Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they > also were > faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take > something hot to > free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy > metal! > > Thinking about what had gotten her into the > predicament in the > first place, both quickly realized that there was > only one way to get > her free. > > So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date > proceeded > to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. > As the audience > screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show > prize hands down... > > Or perhaps that should be "pants down". And you > thought your > first date was embarrassing. > > > Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became > her husband > and was sitting next to her on the Leno show. >